True Emotion

You can’t help how you feel, so just feel it! It is impossible to force around your true emotions. To say “I’m going to think positive,” when your are really worried or fearful just seems like a Band-Aid. The true emotion will always find itself to the forefront and create ruminations in your mind. To excavate and investigate your present sensations seems the best path to take to me. To get to the ground of things. The heart space is where I began to look and breathe into these difficult sensations. Mine was most of the time fear, actually feeling it was how I knew I was making gains towards finding freedom. I would breath and gently feel the pain in my physical heart. I would continue exploring for some time and it always seemed to transmute it into something more manageable and easy. After awhile I worked on the belly, which seemed like the last outpost. I would feel my worries there and investigate the cause. It usually was related to some type of loss of control. A fear of trying to hedge my bets. If I thought about it then it couldn’t possibly be what would happen right? To uncover these sensations took some bravery, somehow we seem disconnected from these sensations and it takes the light of awake awareness turned toward these places. To repeat reorienting to the place that needs attention becomes more natural and automatic after some practice. Finally, a time came when a tipping of the scales happened. I stilled the body, searched deeply and stillness filled everything that I had emptied.

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