A sense of lacking or being seen as lacking is a powerful drive behind our actions. For me I began to realize more and more that I had a deep feeling of not being enough. Never enough intelligence or achievements and the list could go on indefinitely. I began to see this constant grind was blocking me from truly ever having any respite from my thoughts of how I could be more. This powerful message I was continually repeating usually made me my own worst critic. I didn’t take risks in an attempt to not be judged and remained as best I could in my familiar comfort zone. Being exposed and vulnerable feels raw and almost threatening. So I would stay safe and contract and retreat. For me finding the courage to lean in and get closer to the unknown was a necessity. I had a deep sense that continuing on in my old warn out restricted way was not even an option. I began to practice calming my body through movement meditation, as well as moving ever closer to the edge of my previous experience. It took bravery and a willingness to repeat my practice countless times even when it sometimes felt fruitless. I had hope and a desire to prevail and a deep all in attitude. This is that space where innovation, change and inspiration reside. When you remain in a broken loop of habit and conditioning there will be less room for expansion to occur. As well as the fact that even if it does there will be a great deal more efforting to obtain the same result. To lessen the barrier fear and hesitation have between you and your insights creates for lack of a better word, efficiency. The burden of constant worrying is removed and creates an open space. This openness seems to naturally make room for quiet reflection. Where once rumination and attempting to control through thinking once demanded all the room. For me making time for silent open space and moving closer to the edge of my comfort, gave me the freedom I once only imagined others contained. I have also learned that having to much certainty does not create an environment for open investigation. When we are certain, we stop asking questions and remove the opportunity for growth. Over time, uncertainty, the unknown or a never before experienced sensation were what I would look toward for obtaining my aspirations. I still have some fear, but I have practiced trusting that I would much rather lean closer and bend than remain unchanged and brittle. I also cannot emphasize enough the impact that persistence and repetition have had on my growth. Change takes practice, new pathways will not be created by a one and done attitude. My advice is to be brave, have determination and make space for your potential. To me your perceived limits seem to dissolve and new possibilities appear, what a potent ground for inspiration!
Published by One True Breath
I am a wife, mother and a pediatric occupational therapist for almost 20 years. My great hope is that this blog will be a guide for anyone seeking refuge from life's difficulties. It is a distillation of my life experience, profession and whole hearted search for peace. I wish you a wonderful and joyful journey! View all posts by One True Breath